Leadership is like beauty; it’s hard to define, but you know it when you see it.
Leadership is a profoundly non-hierarchical concept. Achieving a position in the hierarchy does not make you a leader! Read more...
Apply a small force to a straight piece of wire and it will bend. Remove the force, and it returns to being straight. You can do this many times and the wire stays straight.
Now apply a greater force. When the force is big enough, the wire 'gives way'. In engineering terms, it goes 'plastic' and deforms. Now when you release the force, the wire remains bent to some degree. The springier the wire, the more force it can withstand and still return to being straight.
When you are challenged or under pressure, you are under stress. That is, you are subject to an external force or stressor. How well you cope with that stressor, whether you deal with it or give way, depends on your level of mental toughness, your 'springiness'.
Have a look at this explanation of what gives you springiness. (And try the above experiment for real with a paper clip or a wire coat hanger).
If you think you are stressed, you can improve your mental toughness and/or you can deal with the stressors you are experiencing.
"Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply" Stephen R. Covey
What stops you from listening effectively?
Are you rehearsing what you want to say next? Are you wishing they would just get on with it? Are you distorting what they are saying so it fits how you view things? Are you doing something else at the same time?
When you are talking, you know when someone is not really listening.
If someone does that to you, how does that make you feel?
Have a look at this checklist, and notice which ones are true for you.
Unless someone printed this tip for you, you are using a computer right now, or your mobile.
How are you sitting?
Are you comfortable?
What is the angle of your neck?
How is your back aligned?
Are your shoulders tensed or lopsided?
If you keep sitting this way for another 30 minutes, will you still be comfortable?
Did you change your posture as you read those questions?
What posture feels better for you?
Here is a diagram with the key points about how to sit when using a computer so that you avoid the postural conditions, and pains, that so many computer users develop. Compare how you are sitting right now with the diagram.
Most of us would greatly benefit from having a timer set to remind us to notice our posture, move, stretch, relax, and get up to walk a bit. Try it!
There are some things we don't like. That seems to be a fact of life for those of us who are not enlightened.
Is there something you don't like so much that it bothers you?
You have two options according to Mary Engelbreit...
"If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change the way you think about it."
I suppose a third choice is to keep doing what you are doing and suffer from your dislike.
So, what bothers you?
What do you choose to do about it?
"Your smile is your logo, your personality is your business card, how you leave others feeling after having an experience with you becomes your trademark." Jay Danzie
How are people impacted by your presence?
What do you want your 'trademark' to be?
This week, after you have met or spoken with someone, take a moment to reflect on how you think they are feeling after interacting with you.
If it's appropriate, you might even go back and ask them :-)
Good listening is an essential part of communication. And good communication is critical to many business interactions. So the more we can improve our listening, the more effective we can be in our work.
How to get better results for you and your team? The 50 Essential Tips for Managers booklet provides helpful tips and advice on key areas of effective management.